Sunday Sample - The Hole In One

What I'm writing right now ... Enjoy!

As we drove out of the parking lot, Kathy tickled Brianna’s tummy and glanced at me. “Tomorrow, I’m going to ask Daddy if I can get someone to refurbish the chairs he has in storage. There’s this huge mahoe desk that … “

While she chatted, I studied her. Well, as much as I could with the steering wheel in my hands. Her hands moved as she talked about where she’d place the furniture and what she’d do for lighting. She glowed as if she’d been sick and had made a miraculous recovery or as if she’d gotten back her mojo. “ … an ad and see what comes of that.”

I missed the first part of what she said, but couldn’t miss her meaning. All of what she was doing would enhance her business, but I had a crappy feeling. I should have been happy for her, but resentment simmered in my bones. 

Since Brianna’s birth, and even before that, I’d done everything I could to ensure Kathy was comfortable. My hours were long but I didn’t mind because I was all about providing what she needed. Things had changed because apparently, what I was doing was no longer enough.

“It’s not about you,” she said.

My gaze flashed between her and peak-hour traffic stretching in front of me. “What?”

 “I said, what I’m doing is not about you and what you do for me.” She stroked my cheek. “It’s about getting back on my feet and doing what I love.”

I grunted but couldn’t find words because I felt like a hater. Her explanation and my resentment made me feel awful. I still didn’t want Kathy working and my feelings weren’t about to change. I’d gotten used to her being at home, taking care of Brianna and me and now she was about to shift things up.

Sunday Sample - The Hole in One

Today, I'm sharing another sample from my work in progress, The Hole in One.

He looked away from Brianna, and our eyes met. She lay sprawled on his chest, a tiny smile on her face, sucking her pacifier. Her eyes were closed and she was such a precious reflection of her dad that tears stung my eyes.

Bryan covered my hand where it lay on the sheet and laced his fingers between mine. We’d gotten sidetracked earlier when Brianna demanded something to eat and then wanted Bryan to chase her around the living room furniture.

She’d exhausted herself and we wound up lying in bed watching television.

When Bryan squeezed my fingers, I met his eyes. The apprehension in his gaze twisted my stomach.

“Aside from wanting to go back to work, I know you have other issues.” He stared at the television screen and then continued. “But I don’t think I’m ready for what you want.”

My eyes cut to him and I frowned. I didn’t understand why he was so afraid of marriage, because as far as I knew his parents had a great relationship. Bryan was so afraid of marriage, he couldn’t say the word.

I shrugged. “Maybe we simply want different things.” I waited a beat before I spoke again. “I just feel that life is passing me by and I’m not prepared to waste any more time.”

“Are you saying what we have is not worth your time?”

I studied Brianna’s face and then focused on him. His lips twisted and from the disappointment and hurt clouding his eyes, he read and understood my thoughts.

“I’m not saying that at all. I just don’t understand why you’re 
afraid of commitment.”

“Why would you say something like that? I wouldn’t be here with you and Brianna if I had a problem committing to you.”

I pulled my hand out of his. “We’ve been living together for five years and the only time the-word-you-can’t-say has come up between us is when I’ve mentioned it.”

He frowned. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t act like you don’t know. I’m not prepared to fart around with you forever.”

“You know that’s in my plans. One day—”

“One day may never come, and I’m not prepared to have you suck me dry while I wait for something that may never materialize.”

“Hold on now, do you know me as a user?”

“No, but I don’t see where our relationship is going and I don’t plan to be your baby-mother forever.”

“I don’t understand,” he said rubbing his forehead. “You’re getting uptight because our friends are getting married?”

“There, you said it, but it seems as if it’s out of bounds for us.”

“Come on, Kay, you know I’m working toward certain things, and until I get there marriage is out of the question.”

I sprang up from the mattress like a jack-in-the-box. “That’s just stupid and you’re making excuses.”

Sunday Sample - The Hole in One

Here's a sample from the The Hole in One ... I hope you enjoy. 

The conversation among the guys last night had upset Kathy and without sending another glance her way, I knew she was still sore. 

After the gang left, I played with Brianna while Kathy cleaned up. When she finished in the kitchen, she took Brianna from me and went to bedroom. Knowing I was in the doghouse, I made sure to leave the living room tidy.

I didn’t exactly dread going to bed, but with Kathy in a mood, I was wary. Once I stepped into the bedroom, I knew what kind of night it would be. Brianna was going to be sleeping with us and since she wasn't ill, it meant one thing: Kathy was mad as hell.

No matter how I felt, touching her tonight wouldn't be an option. She wasn't aiming, interested, or in the mood to make love with me. Nor did she want me in touching distance.

To cement her message, if I was dense enough not to get it, once the baby was asleep, Kathy surrounded her on both sides with soft pillows and turned away from me. It was childish, but in her mind she'd fulfilled her need to send me a message.

After a while, I slept but I was uneasy because Kathy had been restless for a while now.

Brianna squealed, as though needing my attention and her cry brought me back to the kitchen. I sent her air kisses, which made her giggle and when I looked away from her I realized Kathy was watching me.

"What did I do?"

The question slipped out before I could pull it back. I had more than an inkling of what had gone wrong, but I wasn't ready to face the music.

She took her time sipping coffee and met my gaze when she was good and ready. "You didn't do anything."

"So, what's the problem?"

I tickled Brianna with one finger, delighting in her squeal, but kept my eyes on Kathy.

"The fact that you can't even acknowledge what's wrong."

I swallowed a mouthful of coffee, analyzing her over the rim, and giving myself time to form the right words. "You know I don't play guessing games. If you don't tell me what's wrong, how can I know?"

She sucked her teeth, which surprised me. She knew I didn't like it when she did that because we both understood it was her way of telling me she was done talking. True to form, she pushed the chair away from the table and got up. Shaking her head as if I was hopeless, she picked up my plate, although I wasn't finished eating.

Though I knew she wasn't in a receptive mood, I held on to her wrist and looked up at her. "Talk to me, Kay."

She glanced at the clock over the doorway to the kitchen before turning back to me. "Frankly, I'm tired of talking."

I didn’t know what to say because it was clear she wasn't in a good mood. To my surprise, her eyes softened. "Now isn't a good time, since you have to be at work."

"It's Saturday, remember? I don't have to be there early." I slipped my arm around my waist and pulled her to me. "Plus, I won't be able to concentrate if I know you're upset with me."

She rested her arm behind my shoulder and locked her gaze with mine. "I'm trying to be patient while you do your thing, but sometime I just … "

When the words wouldn't come, I asked, "Are you coming to the course later?"

She shook her head and pulled out of my hold. "No, I'm going to see Mom."

I didn't like the way she said it, but didn't want to start a fight over nothing so I released her. She walked away, and I let her go because there was nothing I could say to make things better.